Do your Relationships Don’t Last? Three months of dating for some of us does not seem like a long time. But for some, it’s the longest time in a relationship.
Finding yourself in this kind of situation can make you question yourself and the people you date. The question is, is it you or the people you attract into your dating life.
In this article, I’m taking you through the 8 possible reasons your relationships do not last more than 3 months.
- You get so much excited once in a relationship
If you find yourself fantasizing about getting married and having kids within the first phase of getting to know each other or even before the relationship starts, that can be one of the reasons why your relationships don’t last more than three months.
I know you will tell me ‘But have heard of couples who recognized each other from the very first time they met’ yeah it happens and a lot but don’t let that blind you.
Listen, the excitement of being in a relationship can make you ignore or compromise any type of behavior you see in your partner. You will ignore the incompatibility there since you have already started thinking of starting a life with them.
Then your partner might eventually notice how incompatible you two are and decide to end the relationship.
- Lack of proper communication
Let me start here, lack of communication is in most cases as a result of point number one. You were excited and you ignored or compromised your partner’s behavior which you find unpleasant or annoying. This is where a lack of communication comes in.
This is a piece of free advice, if your relationship lacks communication then just know it’s dead. Let me give you an example; do you find yourself mad at something or even at your partner and when they ask what’s wrong, you answer with I’m good, it’s nothing, never mind?
The moment you don’t share something bothering you, it starts bringing in issues. Your partner won’t know where to improve or what to work on and this leads to breakups.
- You have very high expectations from your partner.
Getting into a relationship with your ideal girl or man in your mind might be the reason why your relationship doesn’t last.
Let me give you an assignment. Go sample a few young people, especially those not dating, and ask them what kind of a partner they dream of.
You will be surprised by the ridiculous answers given. All they will describe is a beautiful or handsome perfect individual. Then back to you, are you perfect? Of course not because you are human and there is no perfect human, we all make mistakes.
So, getting into a relationship you need to understand it’s not always going to be laughter’s you will need to understand learn and grow together.
- You gossip about your relationship.
A relationship from my understanding is between two people. Therefore, when a third party is involved, the trust is broken. Talking to your friends or family about your relationship or your partner, especially after an argument plays a big part in destroying your relationship.
Gossiping about your relationship brings in trust issues and insecurities since your significant other won’t feel safe around you.
- You focus a lot on your past experiences.
It is always important to take time and heal from your past relationship if it was toxic. One of the major reasons you might be having a problem with keeping your relationship is focusing on your past.
What do I mean, if you find yourself trying to locate a toxic trait from your previous relationship with your partner then that’s one sign you didn’t heal from it.
Instead of focusing so much on what happened in your past give yourself a chance to get to know your partner for who they are.
- You withdraw during arguments.
Let me ask, if you find yourself withdrawing from an argument, what are your reasons for that. Arguments are ok in relationships what’s not ok is not solving the issue.
Unsolved issues play a big part in destroying a relationship. This goes back to communication if you are not ready to talk and put your issues behind, then things will keep on getting complicated and the trust and the bond will fade leading to breakups.
- You are in it for the wrong reasons.
Let me take you back to how young people fantasize about what kind of a relationship they want. As young people, we all want a beautiful independent woman and a handsome guy who is financially stable.
Let’s say you meet this guy. He is good-looking and, he is financially stable.
Then because your ideal guy was handsome and financially stable, you decide to get into a relationship with him.
You did not consider the character and values of that individual.
When you finally realize things about that person you cannot put up with, you will find yourself walking out of that relationship.
If you find yourself getting into a relationship for selfish reasons, take time and rethink if you have to be in that relationship.
- You based it on lies.
A long-lasting relationship should be based on truth which helps in building a bond by the trust earned. If a relationship is then based on lies, it becomes so hard for your partner to trust anything you say ones, they learn the truth.
Starting a relationship with lies turns every other single thing into a lie because you will be forced to lie to cover up for other lies.
Let’s say you realize 60 percent of what you know about your partner is all lies; how would you react to that? I bet it would be hard to believe anything they say.
Trust is built, over time but it can be broken within a second if lies are involved.
if you have come up to this point, I believe you have found the article worth reading. I hope this article has helped you realize what you are doing wrong and how to get yourself out of that situation.